Where did all the good times go?

I remember my mother telling me something when she was 75. "It's hard to look at this old body and realize it's my body because my mind is still the same as it was at 20."

My best friend came over last night for dinner and we broke out the photographs. We've known each other since the ripe age of 15 and have been through a lot together. We've fought over guys, cut school, gotten drunk, got thrown out of night clubs, school and church, and have been grounded more times than we can count. As we age together, we still feel the same as we did back then. While we may have learned to control ourselves most of the time, we still feel 20.

As we thumbed through the photographs, we wondered where the time went. We look so young and hot dressed in our Chemin de fer jeans and skin-tight striped t-shirts. Our life was in front of us so we took ourselves much less seriously. I can't remember worrying about anything back then. This is when I realize I've aged. Life was so much easier growing up in the 70s and 80s. There was no Internet or cell phones. If my car broke down, I had to walk to a phone booth. If I wanted to hear the news, I had to wait to see it at 5 o'clock on TV or pick up a paper. Who am I kidding, I didn't want to hear the news.

Now I have no choice. It's everywhere I turn - in restaurants on a wide-screen TV, on my computer screen, on my cell phone. No wonder everyone is so friggin' depressed. I miss the pre-AIDS, pre-wired days of growing up. The worst case scenario if you went home with someone and slept with them was that you might get herpes or gonorrhea. Now you can die. No wonder my best friend and I look so happy in all the photographs. What did we have to worry about?

As we sat drinking wine, talking about her upcoming shrink's appointment and the drugs she's on for depression and anxiety, I reminisced about the old days of sex and rock-n-roll, minus the consequences. I thought about my daughter and my students and all the other young people struggling with depression and anxiety due to a world filled with negativity. Sure, the world was always filled with negativity but at least it wasn't in your face 24-hours-a-day. Sad thing is, you can't disconnect. Even if you make a conscious effort to stay away from the constant flow of negativity, it's everywhere you turn. It's impossible to live without a computer and the Internet in today's society.

So we all plow ahead, popping Prozac and happy pills, stocking up on self-help books to help us balance life. Sometimes I just want to open my window, throw out my computer and scream, "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore."

Peter Gibbons: So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life.
Dr. Swanson: What about today? Is today the worst day of your life?
Peter Gibbons: Yeah.
Dr. Swanson: Wow, that's messed up.